Why does my girlfriend share a close friend AND a love of Malort with my ex-girlfriend? What is the world trying to tell me?
Tag: wtf
1. You’re beautiful, 2. You’re so smart, 3. You’re kind.
My coworker-slash-friend bought a birthday present for my girlfriend. I HAVEN’T EVEN GOTTEN A BDAY PRESENT FOR MY GIRLFRIEND YET
(via aJackieLarsen)
Kid: My mom said I should stop reading parenting magazines in the waiting room.
Me: Oh?
Kid: “kids say the darnedest things about the birds and the bees.”
Me: I mean that probably is something your parents should explain to you.
Kid: I learned that in fifth grade. *mimics peer* “a baby comes from a vagina?!”
Me: YOU’RE 12
Kid: My mom said I should stop reading parenting magazines in the waiting room.
Me: Oh?
Kid: “kids say the darnedest things about the birds and the bees.”
Me: I mean that probably is something your parents should explain to you.
Kid: I learned that in fifth grade. *mimics peer* “a baby comes from a vagina?!”
Me: YOU’RE 12
Had a headache yesterday so tried to take a nap, ended up sleeping for like 7 straight hours. Apparently the side effect labels take “drowsiness” not quite seriously enough.
We all are stardust 